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首页 > > 内容

戈壁创投:工作中,我们能从自恋狂身上学到什么?

来源:投中网 作者:戈壁创投 2018年05月16日 17:24:00
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投中网(https://www.chinaventure.com.cn) 编者按:还有一种较为隐秘的类型:集体性自恋狂。

Here’s how to spot them.

下面来介绍如何识别这两种自恋狂。

Most workplaces have a narcissist, and they’re not so hard to identify. They’re the ones who know the best way to do everything (and must tell you about it in incredible detail), they crave praise more than caffeine, and they put the “me” into meetings.

我们在大多数工作场合所中都会遇到自恋狂,但是却很难识别出来。自恋狂往往了解各种问题的最佳处理方式(而且必定会事无巨细地讲述出来)。他们对赞扬的渴求比咖啡因更为上瘾,因此他们在集体活动中中往往会以“自我”为中心。

“The most important thing to them is how they look and how they’re seen,” says Randall S. Peterson, a professor at the London Business School who studies narcissists in the workplace, in a TEDx Talk.

“对他们而言,最重要的就是他们的外在表现以及别人对他们的看法,”伦敦商学院工作场所自恋狂课题研究教授Randall S. Peterson在一次TED研究中提到。

This type — called the agentic narcissist — is the classic type. In a study, agentic narcissists were more likely to agree with statements like “Superiority is something you are born with” and “I always know what I’m doing.”

这种类型的人被称为主体性自恋狂,是最典型的一种类型。研究发现,主体性自恋狂更愿意接受“你与生俱来就有优越感,而我对自己的所作所为一直具有清醒的认知”等诸如此类的说法。

But there’s a stealthier kind: the communal narcissist.

但还有一种较为隐秘的类型:集体性自恋狂。

Think of them as martyrs with megaphones. They talk endlessly about how the team/office/company would fall apart without them, and they rush to assist in every situation — even ones they know nothing about — because they live to help.

他们自认为是普度众生的英雄人物,滔滔不绝地宣扬着团队、办公室、公司如何离不开他们,出于乐善好施,他们急于帮助处理所有情况,即使自己对其一无所知。

“They are self-appointed saints who have unrealistic views of their contributions to others,” Peterson wrote in the Harvard Business Review. In a study, communal narcissists strongly agreed with statements like “I am the most helpful person I know” and “I will be famous for people’s wellbeing.”

“他们自命为圣人,对自己给予他人的贡献具有不切实际的幻想,”Peterson在《哈佛商业评论》中写道。研究发现,集体性自恋狂强烈认为“我是最有用的人”和“我将为人类事业做出杰出的贡献”等诸如此类的说法。

What’s the best way to work with the two types of narcissists?

那么,应对这两种自恋狂的最佳方式是什么呢?

Well, there’s a good chance your boss may be a classic narcissist. “Our co-workers who overestimate their prospects in life tend to be more willing to take risks, show a desire to win, and come across as competent,” says Peterson. “And they’re much more likely to be selected as leaders.”

你的老板有可能恰好是一位典型的自恋狂。“我们的同事中,有些人习惯高估自己在生活中的预期表现,他们通常更愿意接受冒险,迫切希望获得成功,并且表现的似乎很有能力,”Peterson表示,“因此,他们也更有可能被选举为领导。”

First, realize they’re never going to change. So don’t expect them to start asking you about your ideas or your weekend — bring them up yourself.

首先,你要认识到,他们永远不可能改变。因此,不要期待他们会主动询问你的观点或周末安排,而是要自己主动提出来。

Then, suggest they delegate simpler projects and tasks and steer them towards initiatives that call for complete overhauls. “They’re really great at rethinking things and blowing them up,” says Peterson.

然后,建议他们委派比较简单的项目和任务,并引导由他们自己亲自负责。“他们确实非常擅长反思并且把事情搞砸,”Peterson说道。

At times, classic narcissists may harm a workplace if their behavior starts hurting other people and bringing down morale. The way to combat this, advises Peterson, is to drain their sources of support. When they don’t receive positive feedback from others, most narcissists will start to shrink.

有时,如果典型性自恋狂的行为开始伤害到其他人并会打压士气,就可能会在职场中中产生不利影响。Peterson建议,应对这种局面的方法是减少给予他们支持的相关资源。如果这类自恋狂无法获得他人的正面反馈,大多数人就会开始退缩。

With the communal narcissist, encourage them to work with as many teams as possible. “The more people they feel connected to, the more people they’re going to help, and that will benefit everyone,” says Peterson.

对于集体性自恋狂,要鼓励他们与尽可能多的团队合作。“一旦他们感觉与自己相关的人越多,他们就会帮助更多的人,这将会使所有人受益,”Peterson表示。

Because this type is reluctant to give credit to others — they must always be the biggest helper — make sure your contributions are recognized. While you’re at it, put a word in for your colleagues, too.

由于这种类型的自恋狂一贯认为自己是最大的提供帮助者,并且不愿意将功劳归功于他人,因此请务必确保自己的贡献得到认可。处理此类情形时,也要推荐一下自己的同事。

But remember, most of us can learn something from narcissists. With classic narcissists, we might steal some of their swagger.

但需要记住一点,大多数人都可以从自恋狂身上学到一些东西。对于典型自恋狂,我们可以学习他们的自信。

“It could encourage you to give a talk, stand up for what you believe in, and do things you otherwise would not take on,” says Peterson. “This can help us build our self-efficacy and confidence.”

“它可以帮你在演讲时充满勇气,让你坚持自己的信念,让你勇敢接受曾经害怕的挑战,”Peterson说道,“还可以帮助我们构建自我认同感和自信心。”

Or, taking a tip from communal narcissists, we might go out of our way to offer to help our colleagues.

或者,你可以从集体性自恋狂那里获得影响,从而竭尽全力去帮助其他同事。

If you use it wisely, a little bit of narcissism might be a good thing.

如果您能恰当地运用这一点,也许一点点的自恋可能还是一件好事。


(编辑:冉一方)

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